


Puella Magi: Crimson Tears

by DaLewisII



Category: Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magika | Puella Magi Madoka Magica
Genre: Drama, Drama & Romance, F/M, Romance, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:08:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24259420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaLewisII/pseuds/DaLewisII
Summary: I never imagined it. My life made no sense and for the most part I didn't care. Now as the world descents into chaos, I see things pretty clear. The fear and anguish, the violence and perversion. Yet I still believe in hope and love. I never thought my life would change like this. I never imagined I'd fall in love... with a Puella Magi.(This is a Spin-off based on the Madoka Magica universe, hope you guys like it.)
Kudos: 1





	1. Letter 1

Letter 1.

Dear Nelly,

There was a time I fell in love with the rain, you know? When it rained in the summer at night, I always imagined a goth girl that appeared and jumped from the wall in front of my room to my window, where I catched her between my arms and we kissed. Yeah, middle school was lonely like that.

No friends. My mom just yelling at me about stupid bullshit. My dad absent for work as usual. My computer and my guitar was the only thing keeping me afloat. Still, I was always too shy to improve my skills and become a fat teenage rockstar.

Ever since we started dating I've had the fear that I might return to that body type. It's incredible to look back and see all we've been through. I love what an incredible person you have become and I'm really surprised how well I have aged. Seriously. My dad said he started losing hair around my age. Anyway I'll cut to the chase, I just wanted to let you know that I am truly happy with you and that I would like to talk about some of my feelings, some things I never told you. We've had few occasions to talk these days and that's normal. I just want to make sure you didn't forget what I'm about to say, so I wrote it for my little knucklehead. I know you hate that nickname. Let's start with the first time we met.

Most love stories always start with the same cliché: I fell in love with you the day we met. To be honest, I didn't. A day like any other, that's what it was for me. I sat there waiting for the bus, like going to class on time that day was gonna change my horrible attendance record. Still, dad would get pissed for that too. Just wanted to avoid any conflict while they discussed about the mistake of letting my brother escape with his boyfriend again. I also kinda wanted to get some sunlight i guess. So I sat there waiting at the bus stop, and then, something started to bother me. It was you. A lonely girl with a permanent angry expression looking at nothing in particular. Your soft, long dark brown hair. Your eyes, dark brown to an almost black tone were accented by those very thin dark circles. That soft Ivory skin of yours (that's my mom's observation). Your thin body and slightly wrinkled white long sleeved shirt and black pants, holding some books. You seemed to be tired, more than what I've seen you lately.

The idea of someone looking more miserable than me perplexed me and made me mad, reminded me how much of an idiot I am.

I rode the bus as usual and glimpsed at you a second time. just another random stranger I saw before going to school. Once I was done with the day and walked for the door, I realized next monday would the first of finals. Then it hit me, I would be 17 the next week, and next month was the graduation. No idea where I wanted to study, what I wanted to do with my life. Still, it was possible I'd fail some assignments and I was 1 year younger than my generation, so maybe I could look for new friends and figure it out. I glimpsed at Clara on a far hallway for a second or two and left. Chango was waiting for me as usual at the door. He was never there when my mom was sick or when they rejected me for that college, but he would look for me and call me a friend as long as I'd buy him another drink. That's pretty much how many human relations work nowadays I guess, searching people only for interest.

We went to the old house as usual since last year. The usual guy gave us the regular treats. A couple of potheads were laying on a couch and a needle guy was laying on the carpet. I popped up some shrooms before the shot. Figured it would be a good time to try them. It was a good training for the labyrinths I guess. So full of colors, images and sensations. Wish I could remember it better to describe them to you, but the bright colors and shapes were a recurrent element in most of them, blurring the line between dream and nightmare. Some hours later I remember walking home and falling to my bed with the sound of a TV in the distance. Felt mom's hand caressing my hair and covering me with a sheet to sleep. Woke up in my room and rushed to look at my phone, it was saturday morning. Thought about those times I said I'd prefer to die when I was bullied. My parents were asleep. Walked up to the rooftop and gazed at the thick layer of smog over the waking city, that volcano I used to stare at as a kid waiting for an eruption. I stepped forward to the edge of our small backyard.

Couldn't do it.

The perfect moment and I ruined it as usual. Part of me felt miserable yet I felt something was contempt inside. Guess I wanted to beat the stereotype, the first junkie wanting to live. I told my parents the truth the next day and they shed a few tears, then bursted screaming into another discussion while I looked for NA's number.

Don't know how many times I've told you this, but recovery from that time was a pain in the ass. I went to therapy, my dad wasn't there, then mom said he left us but she'd never leave me. My sponsor would suggest me to find a job for experience or to distract myself, it would be the perfect excuse to avoid her and not to be rude. Tell her i didn't care if she loved him or not. What would you expect from someone who got married out of a premature pregnancy? I feel bad but even I know my mom suffered from terrible dependence and guilt for that and she sometimes can be a compulsive liar. I know it 'cuz as you might know I have some of that as well. To be perfectly honest, although i met Bruno, Monika and Fredy and we used to hang out pretty often (talk about movies, god, music, the usual shit), I didn't feel happy for overcoming drugs. Had to repeat 3 subjects for the 2nd time and felt the stares in school when everyone found out I was a 18 year old junkie trying to finish high school and get his shit together. Had to smile, say I believed in a god and apologize to people who didn't care about me, although it was good to see mom happy. I'm not sure but I think I wanted to find some kind of big reward for changing that much. I expected to be full of friends, success and seeing a big hand in the sky giving me a thumbs up. I think that's what they see at church.

Still, I didn't care about that one girl I saw at that bus stop. Yet, i found you one day after work. I remembered chopping onions for those sandwiches and having sticky, smelly hands. Something at the back of my head said that it was a bad idea. I felt tired and wanted to go home to eat some cereal. But for the first time, something bursted out of my chest. Felt like I was crossing a barrier, something that the old me was scared to do. My life could've stayed the same. Yet, I did it. I talked to you.

"H-hey"

I remember waving at you. I felt my face rushing blood as my tanned skin disguised my blush, at least I think it did. I remember seeing someone similar to you talking to Monika the other day when we picked her from school.

"Have I seen you before? You study at Bluefields? Name's Julio by the way" I stuck my smelly hand out.

I tried to give my best smile but felt like an idiot.

"Leave me alone".

You walked away with that judging look and left me hanging. "That's what I get for being different, I guess" I mumbled.

Started walking down the street as I wanted to walk my shame away. as I got close to the old tracks I heard what appeared to be a scream. Another mugging as usual, I figured. I rushed my pace to avoid being assaulted for the 2nd time of the month. Noticed some things starting to flare in colors and figures to distort. Multiple stop signs and track red lights started to appear in rows. Felt like some kind of insect bit my neck and tried to kill it with no results. Just another nightmare, i thought. Just another episode. Perhaps the withdrawal kicked in several months later. I wanted to call my sponsor Gabriel again. My phone grew legs and walked away. Then I felt it: the pain, the sadness, the anger, the melancholy, the feeling when you know y'ain't worth shit and only occupy space in existence.

My body started moving by itself as my consciousness separated from it. Remember seeing a train incoming as I stood in the middle of the tracks. Couldn't scream, couldn't stop. Still, the feelings didn't overwhelmed me enough to let go and kill myself. I felt strong. Decided to put my mind on living. I tried with all my might and managed to move and barely avoid the train. I suddenly stopped without making a noise. It was a cargo train and the doors of its cars opened for a show I wasn't expecting to attend. The sound of pacing masses, train breaks, high-pitched whistles, both children and maniacal laughter, all overwhelmed me and made me feel I wasn't sane anymore. strange creatures appeared and walked in rows like a parade. Bushes and trees with cute faces walked towards me, behind them legged brushes and pencils. jars of paint with silly yet disturbing expressions. A whole parade of freaks.

One of the small bastards started biting my arm and as I somehow was able to shake it away, felt the stares of his buddies ready to attack me. Guess they felt like toying with me. I've never been good at fights, but I still remembers some of my brawls. Threw rocks at them and started punching and kicking those disturbing creatures as well as i could. One of them caught my hand and squeezed it so hard I felt my fingers being dislocated and my bones crushed. Another slided under my separated legs and scratched my inner thigh. I felt my blood gushing intensely. Kicked it away and limped as far as I could.I was surrounded with lethal life and color, thinking that I would die by the colors I loved so much back in the day. 

I remember the first time I saw you wearing that dress. It struck me as lightning when I guessed its time period. A Leg-of-Mutton Sleeve khaki colored dress, a white vest with gold rivets that combined with the details of your dark green skirt. A black mini boater straw hat with a black ribbon on your head and a small white lotus flower with as a hair ornament. Leather boots with gold details. You looked like a rich girl straight outta Paris, the old fashioned ones, the ones that my great grandmother was desperate to imitate from that dictator's time. Impeccable, elegant. Totally your personality.

You were surrounded by puddles of black gore and holding your trusty Macuahuitl in your right hand. My grandpa knew an archaeologist that showed me one of those at the museum. I still like yours better, with those steel teeth, carved wood body, intricate jade and jewel patterns. Sooo you.

You jumped a couple of meters in the air while you threw some of your weapons teeth with a swing as darts killing the minions. They obviously returned to its place as you kept swinging to get the leading behemoth. Some kind of horned lizard chameleon, who kept spitting its tongue with thorns, full of glowing colors like a lava lamp but with a trippy appearance, almost like a drawing that had come to life. You dodged everyone of its thrusts as giant trees appeared behind it. It lept from tree to tree as you chased it. I remember your face as you split the creature's skull in two, stone cold murder, like some kind of a la mode assassin. You reached for some kind of black light inside it and transformed it to a black marble that you stuck to an egg shaped emerald, which transformed shined intensely and absorbed it .

"Never talk of what you saw here." You said while glimpsing at me from a few steps away.

"Wh-What are you?" I softly whispered. 

Something knocked me out. Bet it was you. Woke up with my hand bandaged. It hurt but it wasn't swallowed or felt broken. Thanks for that. Was all a dream? Whatever it was, I swore I would not speak about it. Nobody would believe me.

I stood up and saw my bandaged leg. I removed it and saw there was no such scar. Only some kind of very small dark bruise. After getting out of the shower I noticed it. A strange text on the back of my right shoulder. I ran out and looked for mom, asked her what it meant. She couldn't see anything. I spent all sunday convincing myself it wasn't there.

On monday, it disappeared. Yet my mind was plagued with questions. As I left work I ran to that bus stop. You weren't there. I really wanted to forget you, yet my mind kept pushing me forward. I felt a pain on my shoulder and saw a man in the distance towards the bridge. Somehow, it felt familiar. Saw his face with no expression, sensed a shiver that went all the way down my spine. Somehow, I knew he wanted to kill himself.

I ran for it as he approached a bridge overlooking a dried river, now a trench with sharp pointed rocks and lots of really nasty garbage. Somehow I started talking to him. Tried to convince him. He wouldn't answer. He stepped forward into the edge. Then I grabbed his hand. He tried to pull and I held him between my arms. He woke up surprised and then he squinted ready to cry, his voice bursted into sadness. "Why the fuck is life like this?" He yelled "I fucking lost everything, nobody loves me, my wife and daughter died, my parents disowned me, what reason do I have to live?" "There's gotta be a reason man" I screamed. Was my heart not me. "There´s gotta be for fuck's sake. We can't find it being dead. Please don't do it". I pulled him and we fell on the sidewalk. He started to cry while I stood up. we spoke the next day, he seemed more calm. Thanked me, gave me a big hug and told me he would be outta town for few days. Wanted to find himself but he'd be in contact with his new bff. Good Ol' Pablo was better.

You appeared right behind me that very night, with your big judging eyes. I wanted to ignore you, to let you go. But my heart interrupted as usual:

"I have to talk to you" I spat my feelings out.

"No."

"Please…"

"Can I get coffee?" you said.

"Sure...” 

"Ok." (End of letter.)


	2. Letter 2

Letter 2

The night went from dry to very rainy in a couple of minutes. We ran into an alley I knew and through that small green door under a tree.

I remember your face nibbling on those big chocolate chip cookies. You looked like a hamster, more concerned on filling your mouth than your belly (I know you are ashamed of that but I find it really cute.) Always liked that organic caffé just for its latte, they make that fancy leaf thing and it's still half the price. You sipped it without seeing if it was hot, then drank it whole, returning to your cookies.

I remember staring at you. Trying to see some kind of circuit or fairy dust. Guess I was too scared of you and needed to believe you were an alien or a fairy or some otherworldly thing. Nothing. Just a cute tired face and those dark eyes, staring at me all of a sudden.

"Need anything else ?" I said outta fear.

"Nah I'm good. We can go" you answered.

"Where?"

"Wherever you wanna go."

"Oh. u-um, let's stay here for a while." Few times in my life I've felt that intimidated. You frowned.

""Didn't you wanted to fuck me or something?"". That was the first time you legit took me by surprise.

"What? No! What the hell?! I just met you!" Remember I was blushing like crazy. The idea turned me on, but not enough to make me forget that night. I sipped my cappuccino and prepared to skip to the chase.

"Can you at least tell me your name?" I followed up.

You stopped eating and used your annoyance face against me for the first time.

"I'm Nelly" you bowed sarcastically, made a gesture with your hands and kept eating

We stayed quiet for a while

" what was all that about?" I finally asked.

You looked legitimately confused.

"That whole Belle Époque outfit thing. Fighting that LSD monster and shit. What's up with that?" I followed up.

"You shouldn't remember that."

"And yet I do" remember saying.

You scoffed and turned to the window. You Took a breath and murmured: "hey".

Looked around. Nothing happened. Looked at me and started talking with your eyes on me and your head pointing elsewhere.

" Have you ever heard that emotions are powerful and all that self- motivation bullshit? Well It's kinda true.

What you saw was a Witch barrier or maze, created by the negative energy of thousands of people. Their fears, their sorrows, their insecurity. They were turned into their death wishes by a Witch. That big ass monster you saw. They control reality using humans and their electromagnetic energy through emotions."

Part of me wanted to deny it, blame it on drugs. Guess being at the brink of death makes a more open minded person.

"Shouldn't this be the part where you come in and explain him about our magic world and our noble crusade?" You yelled

"You seemed to be doing pretty well so far" a voice in the air said

A creature jumped on our table. A cat, or what seemed to be the drawing of a cat coming to life. Its ears had some kind of extensions. Its forehead had a blue jewel and his fur was black with a white egg shaped spot on its back. That damn monster, NeKyubey.

"I was making time so you could erase his memory, you dumbass" you answered.

"He can't be affected by my magic. He has already overcome the force of a Witch kiss and you healed him with your Soul gem. It practically makes him a part of our world now."

"Uuuuuggghhh" You slided down the seat, touching my feet.

"Hello friend. I guess you're pretty shocked. You should better get used to it"

I started turning around looking for any witnesses. No one was watching.

"Relax. I blocked perception on us as soon as you ended ordering."

Those damn lips wouldn't move. That face always remained still. Even now it makes me anxious as hell. Not counting it was a fucking talking animal. Or alien, whatever. He kept going.

"Nelly is one of the many magical girls, Puella Magi if you prefer. Dedicated to fight the witches and protect the world from destruction preventing death and despair. They have been in this world for centuries and their struggle has kept humanity pushing forward through the ages. Their Soul gem is the source of their power and primary tool."

It tried to reach for your gem and you snapped it away.

"Yeah whatever,"

Remember how shocked I felt when I watched you smash that prick with your weapon against the wall. That cute little thing became mush in a matter of seconds. Didn't know at the time I would later enjoy that scene more and more.

We ran away and stopped in front of a bakery where the sunshade covered us from the now pouring rain. I was panting and leaning on a wall but you remained all calm and pretty as usual. You touched my butt and reached for my phone as I straightened up both ashamed and confused. Then I saw you tapping on it.

"Now listen you smart ass, you will stay away from me as far as possible"

You dialed your number

"You will contact me whenever you see a Witch and stay outta trouble. No matter what it says or what the other girls tell you don't listen to'em"

"It?"

"NeKyubey. The alien"

"But it's dead"

"He's not. Trust me."

"Ok."

You finished saving the contact and pulled that last cookie out of your pocket. Chomped ir and swallowed the last bits. Turned around and looked at me from behind. You softly said something I'll never forget:

"Thank you for saving that guy the other day. I was too far away to reach for him."

You jumped from the ground to a rooftop like a giant grasshopper. Remember going home and laying on my bed trying to process all that weird stuff. Fell asleep as I read what you wrote on my cellphone..

"Well done guessing the time period. Most people think it's a Victorian dress"

The next day was pretty normal. Came down the stairs reading a chemistry book and mom smiled at me while she gave me my regular toast. After work I was walking towards the bus stop

Felt something I'll never forget: the barrel of a gun. Then, lights out. Been mugged more than once on my way home, but this was the first time I've been kidnapped.

Woke up tied to a chair. I was in the middle of a motel room. Just like the movies, so I was kinda prepared for some explaining, and torture. Never expected a cowgirl with a flappy red white and green blouse, knee length dark brown skirt and decorated leather boots. Her blonde hair was elegantly braided and tucked under her hat.

"Hello sunshine...feeling dizzy?"

I stared at her blurry shape and didn't say a word.

"Let's cut the bullshit and tell me what I need to know. How did you survive?"

"What?"

"I saw your mark on your neck. Nobody has a Witch Kiss for so long. Witches follow you to finish the job unless we stop them. Also, you've been close to Nelly. What are you? Her informant? Her bitch?"

"Have no idea what you mean."

She broke my pinky with a swift hammer move and put her revolver on my head. it was shiny, decorated. From the wild west, perhaps. she had two of them. Her green eyes dilated, girl was craving for my blood.

"You better spit it out or this will turn ugly, tough guy"

"I seriously don't know anything. I just avoided death. Please, I'm innocent."

Remember when she pulled out that screwdriver. Her dad taught her the trick, she told me later. The first strike is soft , the second one is swift and strong, so the fingernail flies away easier. I felt almost nothing, then my finger started to burn and my hand became almost numb.

A car alarm interrupted the interrogation and my mark started glowing. She jumped from the window and I watched in the distance a shadow moving, then I saw those scary eyes of yours. Seems you didn't really cared about me at the time. Guess we all saw it later int the distance: Another maze. The deserted panoram full of dusty bars and sketchy motels became a show of light when the sky started to show thousands of precious stones. Diamonds, sapphires, emeralds, rubies. People started to gather and beat the shit out of each other on a barren field. Gold statues shaped like Greek gods and animals started moving and charged towards both of you, along with giant spiders made of gold coins. At the center, a giant ass blue Faberge egg with an endless number of glowing multi colored flowers, blooming and closing, again and again, with golden legs and golden details. Although it had no head, we all knew it was clearly another Witch.

Seeing her in action was disturbing. Her style was more direct, bloodier and merciless . Shredded those sculptures filling them with bullet holes. Both her arms waved around always together while she jumped over her targets. You on the other hand were chasing the Witch while her big golden legs tried to crush you.

I ran downstairs. Stared at those gallant figures battling that trippy monster. Couldn't do anything. Felt so miserable and impotent. Remembered what NeKyubey said.

Then I saw some kind of tentacle spring out and trying to crush that girl. Didn't even thought about, I ran fast enough and pushed her.

Next thing I knew i felt my arm like a bag filled with jam. Broken and useless. Started kicking small gold angels and some animals. The coin spiders tried to step on me and i ran away. Remember being scratched and beaten by them until I saw the same tentacle trying to crush me again. Saw you guys taking the Witch down. I stayed on my knees, gasping for air and focusing on not giving in to the pain while you came close to see me. Not sure if I fainted though. Next morning mom told me I arrived pretty late and found me. Couldn't come up with a better excuse: I saved someone from being run over. She seemed pretty contempt and I later called in sick for work. Found your message that same night.

"Dont do that stupid shit again, we need you. Her name's Isabella btw, she says thx"

That's when I started realizing… I kinda liked receiving your messages.

(End of letter.)


	3. Letter 3

Letter 3.

The sun was burning as usual but weather felt a little bit cold that day. Remember that awesome smell of charcoal and the bitterness of my cold beer. The view was amazing even with the clothes lines. A clear view to those colorful yet dangerous slums, and further away, hills. At the other side that mountain that surrounded the valley. My uncle used to live in a similar apartment building, didn't know you could have a barbecue on the rooftop though. I was glad that Pablo invited me, needed an excuse to distract myself. The cast felt really itchy that day and yet all I really cared about was hanging out with the squad.

The food kicked ass. Sirloin was brought by Bryan, Pablo's new friend, and he brought Tortillas and Chorizo. Mom helped me make some Guacamole and I brought the beers, Bruno came with the charcoal and chips. All ready for the big game.

As soon as we finished we all came 2 floors down to Pablo's. His TV was small but of good quality. Had a brief glimpse at his new place: everything seemed to be in order. Modest yet refined furniture, clean dishes, a charging laptop, colorful portraits of his family with black ribbons. My friend got his life together. I was proud of him.

We arrived on time, game had just started.

"This is our year"

"Keep dreaming you idiot"

"They ain't nothing without Mendoza"

"What, still mad your stripes got eliminated?"

It was nice to think something as stupid could make us have such a good time. Barely knew what was happening but I was yelling as if I was at the stadium, while the others screamed at every score. Was the first time in years that I drank more than 4 beers. Game ended and we picked everything up from the rooftop. I even made tacos with the leftovers and brought them down.

We kept drinking, snacking, talking. Bryan talked about his hot neighbor downstairs, Bruno told them about that stupid snoring anecdote, Pablo told us about his new job at a marketing agency, he had also started an online Masters course. They didn't believe the arm thing and started inventing stories. A pretty chill boys reunion.

Bryan brought a game console from his apartment and connected it. Him and Bruno started playing some matches, while my eye catched a small photo on a nightstand: It was Pablo with who I assumed was his family. Pablo and I went to the kitchen, asked him about his feelings. He said he really missed them but that he now tried to live as happily as possible in their memory, visited them every now and then at the cemetery and kept attending AA. Pablo kept talking and my mind started drifting.

I Imagined a torrent of rose and cherry petals flying in the wind. Then from the inside it appeared a long brown mane, your hair, revealing at last your pretty face, staring at me. That pretty face of yours almost stopped time inside my head. Heard Pablo's voice yelling my name.

"Sorry." That was the only answer I could come up with.

"What is it man?"

"Nothing."

"Look, I know you from little time but I'm no fool. You thinking about something."

"Not really."

"A girl?" He punched my shoulder playfully.

I nodded and a shiver ran through my spine. Felt really embarrassed for some reason. It was that "falling in love" kind of embarrassing, or at least that's how I see it now.

"You like her?"

"Not sure. She's very pretty and brave, I'll give her that. Still, she doesn't really care about me and she's kinda dangerous. Don't know what to think…"

"Ask her out."he said

My face went all red. It was stupid in all senses, and yet sounded reasonable.

"Not as a couple. As friends I mean. Get to know her. See if she's worth the risk."

"Oh." I answered.

He kept staring at me and then laughed his chubby ass off. Put his hand on my shoulder while trying to recover his breath. He sighed and cleared a teardrop from his eye.

"It's good to know,huh?"

"What?"

"That after all the shit the world throws at us... after being at the brink of death, we're still able to smile. To get up. To be happy."

"True" I murmured and gave him a hug.

"You pussies wanna come play or ye gonna make out?" yelled a wasted Bryan.

"Can't use my arm you dickhead" I yelled back.

Went back home at 1 am and I texted you.

"Hi. How's it going?"

You didn't answer.

Did the same for the next 6 days. It was the first time I felt worried about you. Still, I thought that being so powerful and deadly, you'd be fine. Nothing could kill you or hurt you, right?

I'm so sorry for lying like that to myself.

Attending only the cash register was nice, didn't have to hear the stupid requests from the damn customers. It was a good working day and it was close to its end. Would've been nice to know it would be the last one.

We saw the lights when the last guy left and we started to clean, it was 5 but we had already covered our shift. Remember my boss' intrigued face when we heard an engine at full throttle, and then…

They were there no more.

A police car just rammed its way in. My partner and boss were dead.

Watched my shirt. It was all covered in blood and chunks of flesh i better not describe. A figure ran inside and inspected the crash zone while I backed off. Couldn't see her that well at first 'cause of the shellshock.

"You happy now? They reached some poor bastards."

I was in disbelief and my stomach suddenly reacted, I threw up then and there. She turned around and stared at me.

"Hope he's alright" she mumbled.

Such a casual reaction couldn't be a good sign. I tried to control myself, cleaned my face up and gambled while she appeared to be distracted.

"Did you kill another witch?"

she turned around.

"You can see us?"

"Us?"

Then I saw NeKyubey at a table, observing me.

"It seems he absorbed part of the magic left by a Witch kiss. I must admit he has a resilience beyond most of his kind."

"So you're not dead." Tried to be sarcastic to sound tough, you know me.

"Only superior magic can kill me. Most of the girls don't have that power."

"Guess you're special then." she said "What's your name?"

"Julio."

"Name's Sandra. You've met the other girls?"

"yes." Showed my nailless finger.

"That's Isabella alright. She likes the Sinaloan way" she said.

"She's from Sinaloa?"

We heard a distant sound. An explosion.

"You should get to cover, or get help. Your condition's not the best"

I inspected the police car and pulled a gun from the driver's corpse.

"First, we stop that Witch. She killed my coworkers."

She nodded and we started running. we followed two stone figures and she used her whip to drag them. She then threw herself and kicked them into dust.

"Those are minions right? aren't they always close to a Witch?"

" Yes, although these ones look like some kind of strays. Their name is familiars by the way."

"NeKyubey taught you that?"

"Nah, it was Nelly. She's kind of a leader although Isabella does whatever the hell she wants."

Heard a mounstrous growl and we both decided to follow it. We arrived at a construction site, were a massive hole on the streets made an entrance to the sewers. We slided in and readied ourselves, not even questioning if it was an entrance to a maze or not.

"Stay behind m-"

She couldnt finish when the first strike almost splattered me. The huge mallet made of revar and concrete was connected to something bigger. Something that was coming fast towards us.

It was dark but we both saw it: a growling, crawling, pulsating mass of darkness and rubble, and at the center of it a flickering purple light. The familiars were mostly made of boulder and bent metal, their made up eyes had lines depicting tears. They had the shape of either little children or curvy women, running towards us. They echoed a provocative voice, almost moaning, repeating three phrases that resound in my head to this day:

"La hora pasa." "La pena se olvida." "La obra queda."  
"Shoot the light."

"What?"

She pulled out her whip and charged towards them.

"Now" she yelled. Used my poor aim to unload the magazine on that light. only three bullets impacted as far as I remember. She climbed over the creature and used her whip to cling to its bullet wounds. Meanwhile I grabbed a piece of revar and started to climb up, to be at a higher ground and fight the familiars. Tried to swat them away but they dragged me and started kicking me while I was down. Remembered Chango's cholo training: Cover your head. Saw the time going slow, the dust coming from the tunnel's roof stopping mid air. the shapes around me stretched and I couldn't move while those damn creatures pommeled the shit outta me. It was a maze now alright.

Didn't know how much i could take, then they all screamed and crumbled down. Started flying all of a sudden till I realized Sandra carried me out while jumping away. It was over.

" Thanks. You gave me the perfect shot."

As she put me down, I noticed a glowing dark jewel on her hand.

"What's that?"

"A Grief Seed. They're fuel for our magic."

While she put it away, I finally had the time to see her up close: White plastic heels and white stockings, a one cut short dress, almost like a romper, but with psychedelic designs. A long necklace, big earrings and a crown made of flowers over her long dark hair. A lovely hippie. Armed with a thick dark whip.

"How many of you are there?" I suddenly asked.

"Its just the three of us here, there are 2 more up north but we watch over most of the country, there are lots more worldwide."

"Never thought it was like that. Makes sense. Why only girls though?"

"Because they were the only ones willing to make the contract."

"Contract, you have to sign a paper?"

Heard my cellphone ringing, as suspected it was mom. Nodded as a way to say goodbye. Wish I stayed a little longer back then, could've saved me so much pain.

Sandra murmured something before I left, something too confusing to understand yet too grim to forget:

"It's a wish you make. Limited only by you. One that sooner or later, you end up regretting. Anyway, thanks, see ya."

(End Letter 3.)


	4. Letter 4

_Letter 4._

Mom held me really scared that same afternoon, she cried and I did my best to calm her. News covered it all: another gas leak explosion near a construction site. Told her my coworkers were collateral damage and I barely made it alive. She thanked God and swore to attend Sunday service. If only she knew I was at the middle of it.

Wonder how many "gas leaks" you had to attend and which were real, those fucking oil pipeline milkers are really persistent and the mayor's been turning a blind eye since forever. Still hard to know which disasters were real and which were product of a Witch.

Remember going back the next day and making up a story for the cops. Luckily, the cameras got somehow damaged and couldn't access to the footage. Remember breaking down at the same spot. Barely let any tears out but my heart could still feel the weight, not being able of telling anyone about this world. Why would anyone believe me?

Took the weekend off. Helped me to prepare my case and the projects for that following week. Classes felt pretty easy for that matter. Nobody knew and nobody asked for what I went through, a win in my book. That friday in the afternoon, I decided to take a walk. Couldn't believe my eyes on what I saw.

Still have this fuzzy feeling when I remember you that day, looking so chill and cute along those dogs all tied to that foldable table's leg.

"Where were you ?"

"Not your business."

"Thought you might be hurt."

"Thank you but I can take care of myself."

"I know… I just…"

Didn't know how to follow up, how to feel.

"So now you sell dogs?"

"They were inside an animal shelter destroyed during the Witch attack. I was late and just left when I found'em. I'm just trying to find them a new home. They were already homeless, so what else can they lose?"

"I can help… I like dogs"

That little chihuahua started growling and barking at me.

"Seems they don't like you."

"Maybe they will if I help'em…"

"Alright, then. Grab some dog food and feed'em. Keep a bag close in case they need to poo."

The day went by and since the first time we met, It was the longest time you've ever stayed with me.

People started showing up, saying they saw the event on your blog. Kids, adults, teens, they really seemed concerned about the dogs. Somehow, we managed to give all of them away by dusk. Even those who were sick. We were packing up the little tables you brought before my heart started to do its thing:

"Didn't know you could care that much for an animal."

"Animals are simple, they just need food, water, sex, a family. Pretty much like us…"

"But they're less destructive, right?"

"Right…"

Tried to shake it off and stretched a little. I wanted to look more confident than I actually was. Remembered what Pablo said and decided to make my move. What else could I lose?

"I'm kinda hungry and have nothing else to do… so…"

"So?"

"What do you say we get something to eat? You do need to eat right?"

You scoffed, giving a faint smile that embarrassed me more than I expected, and yet hooked me into working my way to see that simple smile again.

"No. But since you helped me and you seem like such a dumbass, I'll help you find a place."

We kept walking footbridge after footbridge over the streets. We arrived at that street Island and stopped at that seafood truck in front of it.

"Seems like a good place, y'sure you don't want anything?"

"Ok. Maybe I'd like one of those tacos."

It wasn't a long time since I had such good fish tacos. We ordered too much, but still managed to eat it all. Even the aguachile entrée. Drank a zip of beer while looking at you finishing as I grabbed the strength to do something stupid:

"Well...since I know now you're a dog person and you do have a heart, I gotta tell ya something intimate about me."

"Why would I wanna know that?"

"So you trust me. That's what friends do."

You became serious once more and wiped the sauce off your face.

"I know what you're doing. It's sweet and all but, you're not the first one that invites me lunch or a drink this week Julio."

"How many of them told you their secrets? How many knew you're a Puella Magi?"

"It ain't their business."

"Fine, how many of them cared about what you had to say? How many of them were willing to tell you their fears and problems?"

"You are?"

"I am."

"Fine then. Shoot."

Proceeded to tell my whole addiction story. It was the first time I talked about it with someone outta NA. Most people at school had found out by gossip or the insensitiveness of some teachers. Pablo knows faint details but he didn't really cared about my past. I felt vulnerable, yet disgusted about me at the same time. Was afraid you'd run away from that.

You seemed uneasy, yet you didn't leave. We went silent for a moment. For some reason you decided to break the tension:

"Well, congratulations. Even though you're stubborn and brave and are now recovering, you've now entered our world and your life has become ten times shittier."

Couldn't avoid smiling and giggling.

"At least I've got some new interesting people by my side. I've got you now, for example."

"Thanks. For worrying about me and the girls."

Your awkwardness turned into a half smile and for a brief moment. Felt my heart raising like crazy while I stood up and walked to the cash register and pay the bill. As I paid, my mind repeated the same line: Take her for a walk.

"So anyway…You can tell me about yourself later while we go for a walk? I'm damn full right now."

You nodded.

We walked into the mile long street island. It was brightly illuminated. We could see the gardens, the fountains and sculptures in it. A small cozy mini park for a sunday stroll, except for the fact that cars came and went pretty often all around it. We walked through the gardens and hours passed by, yet you didn't dare say a thing about yourself.

We'd discuss weird things: Philosophy, animals, architecture. Still remember how you made my jaw drop with all that Puella Magi history. I mean, Joan of Arc made sense, even Anne Frank and Malala, but Cleopatra and Marilyn Monroe? Seriously?

Nowadays it makes more sense though. And yet, I couldn't see through that desperate foreshadowing attempt, what you were really going through.

Remember when we tried the marble game, some kind of association was hosting those carnival stalls.

It was really fun to see you tossing those marbles into the holes. I started wondering: Who were you? What kind of person you were before being a Magical girl?

It was so nice to see you relaxed, with a little grin on your face every now and then. Yet you decided not to speak. I wanted to know more about you, but didn't wanna force you. A part of me still wishes I did.

You kept looking at the little crappy plushy you won while we walked on that improvised park. Remember the sound of the fountains. Children running and laughing. Quinceañeras taking pictures near the sculptures. Everything had a taste so different than before. It was you.

Your eyes opened wide when you saw the ferris wheel at the end of the park being lit up. You just walked towards it and I followed you close till we were waiting on the line. Bought some tickets and went in asking no questions. You seemed so excited, as if it was your first time on a ferris wheel. So cute.

We got in and started elevating.The ferris wheel stopped and we could watch the whole city from atop. Lost myself on the view for a moment, until you abruptly spasmed and moved the small booth, scaring the hell outta me.

"Are you all right?"

"I'm fine… just… a little tired."

Noticed your voice slowing down and saw you blinking heavily.

"You don't sleep much do ya?"

"Could you sleep well after watching twisted monsters destroying everything and hundreds of people dying because of your failure?"

"No. Guess that's one more thing we have in common. You're doing your best. Don't feel guilty."

"I don't do it 'cause I like it. It's my destiny. My only duty. The only fucking reason my life is important now."

"It's not. And you know it."

"If that was the case, I would've lived my life normally. As well as the other girls."

"That's why you're their leader right? You don't want them to suffer alone."

"They didn't listen and paid the price, they're all naïve and stupid. I'm too tired to keep discussing, now leave me alone."

I kept my mouth shut 'till decided enough was enough.

"Hey, what was your contract?"

You had already fallen asleep. Couldn't bring myself to waking you up. Your head tilted forward and I tried to grab it as gently as possible avoiding your fall. We ended on the same seat.

You fell asleep on my shoulder. It was so embarrassing yet so peaceful.

You woke up with a serious face, still not as powerful as your judging stare. It was really nice to walk you home. Felt guilty for making you angry about that last conversation and decided to be quiet while you entered that small apartment of yours . And for some reason, you broke the silence:

"Just for the record, I've never tried any drug, but you bet I can drink your sorry ass under the table. And I tricked you into that food truck 'cause fish tacos are my favorite meal, that and sushi. I ate them all the time when I lived in Huatulco."

Felt my cheeks stretch into a relaxed smile.

" Aaand my dad is a lawyer and my mom an accountant. And they live far away from here. My sister left me in charge of the place and abandoned everything to find god or whatever the fuck she believes in. They rarely call me."

"Oh… I'm sorry."

"Nah, don't be. Just stick around please, and don't get killed."

"Deal."

"Good night then."

"Good night."

You went in and closed your door while we stared into each other's eyes for a second or two. I calmly walked away hands on my pockets. Felt light footed, almost floating, with a dumb grin on my face. "Hell of a 1st date" I thought.

The bus felt less cramped that day and even the damn neon purple lights inside didn't bother me. Went down at my usual stop and kept walking, it was almost 11 and mom kept calling me to know where I was, good thing I was almost there.

Then I noticed the shadow on the floor. A cat over a wall, or so I assumed 'till that annoying voice talked to me:

"You seem pretty contempt."

NeKyubey was back.

"Have you been following us?"

"Even I have better things to do than interrupting your date, Julio."

"Who said it was a date ?"

"I can hear your thoughts."

"Why should I trust you?"

"I've never given you any reason not to. Also my race is incapable of lying according to our brain functions."

We walked side by side while I tried to ignore it.

"I can sense your arousal when you're close to her, yet it appears you prefer to keep your distance. Human mating rituals are truly complicated and inefficient. You should just do it and be done with the subject."

"I don't wanna mate with her."

"It is strange… because based on her body temperature and pheromones it seems she wants to."

"What!?"

Tried to regain control of my mind after such reveal. Thought about a different subject:

"What kind of contract do the girls have to make?"

"One of their own free will. I do not force them into anything."

"Then why do they hate you that much? or at least Nelly."

"Because she regrets her wish. She was ostracized by her family as each of her parents became more preoccupied on their new families."

"She wished for her parents to divorce?"

"Not exactly. I see you feel troubled, don't feel sorry for yourself. Most of your race doesn't know about us and have not found out for generations. "

"How do the girls keep the secret?"

"Who would believe them?"

Stopped for a minute to find a response to that statement. Yet I could barely grasp the darkness behind it.

"So... you took advantage of sexism and demeanering of young emotional girls throughout the ages. While making them feel special for such a task by granting them a wish and tricking them to fight these monsters. That's damn cruel." I concluded.

"I am only realist… Reality is beyond your pleasure or pain. Things happen whether you want it or not, and the universe cares little to nothing for humanity."

"And you?"

"Only the necessary"

Appeared at my doorstep before even noticing. Mom yelled a little at me and I did my best to calm her down and get ready to sleep. In bed, my mind tried to even grasp all that happened during the day and fell asleep. It was past midnight when I heard it: gunfire. Wanted to ignore it but then I heard a girl screaming and feared the worst. Went out through the window as silently as I could, almost fell on top of my arm cast. Peeked over the corner of a dark alley and reached for my phone ready to call the cops.

Next thing I saw, Isabella pointing a gun at her chest, right over her egg shaped gem.

(End Letter 4.)


End file.
